Wow

Hello blog...
How have you been?
Hows the the other blogs? Are they treating you okay? Good Good. It's Lovely to hear that.
oh, Me? Well.. I have my ups and downs.... oh like what.. um.. do you want the up or downs first?
Downs, of course you do.. alright.. I'll list them for you.

I'm scared about college in the fall.
I have No money to move out or go to college with
I am afraid i will be in pedestrian mode forever and have to be sneaked into it by a hurt dog like in that clueless episode from the 4th grade
my dad had a artery to his haert collapse
then he had a heart attack
my dad has a 50 percent working heart
they might put in a pacemaker.. that will have a 50 /50 chance of helping him or killing him...
if it works he and my mom will move to Eastern Washington and leave me out here by myself.
Pressures of youth Leader are catching up... and I am feeling inadequate in the many position they have given me.
I am still haunted about my past.. not so much.. but more so into the fact i wont even let HIM touch me now.
I feel like i have been out of school for so long that going back now would be a waste and that i would loose all of my brain knowledge i spent so long working with Pina, McSweeny, and Victoria on learning this past year... and the the math help I will not get again from Heather...
I miss heather.. in a not so crushy way anymore... but in a way that if i saw her it would certainly take my breath for at least a couple seconds.. before i realized what i was thinking.. and then mentally hitting myself upside the head.
I got passed up for the supervisor position at work .. because i didn't have a car.. but i do have a car.. it just only goes backwards.. and i don't have a license.
All my best friends have moved onto college and bigger and better things.. i'm lucky if I get phone calls on occasion from them.

What? you think I'm rambling.. oh you have no idea... oh.. yeah.. i can tell you about the good stuff...

Epic 07 was amazing and opened my life up to a lot of things i haven't thought about before.
I spent close to $ 200
on books and I plan to read them all by the end of the year.. meanwhile sharing them with he rest of the Hallmark Gals I work with.
My dads heart is working at 50% which is higher then the two weeks ago that it was at 28%.
I have made a goal to be more spontaneous.. and I am sticking too it.
I am currently reading Wicked.. a book that i wanted to read for thee years now.. and i am oh so HAPPY to finally be reading it.
I have earned and picked up the nasty habit of annotating in my books.. the good ones.. and have scanned pages of post-its and page number about info i think is interesting... and despite it being nasty.. it helps me to calm down and put my mind to use when i am on 1 hour breaks at hallmark.
I have a new job with the Highline School District as a Clerical Substitute and my orientation is coming up very soon.
because of this new job i will be able to get my license and my insurance for my car...
I have stopped drinking monster... and have been clean of it for almost three weeks.. although.. i feel the need to buy it.... as much as I do a cigarette... I know its bad.. but they feel so good against my lips.
It seems this is the summer for boys to hit on me since any boy has being doing so.. and i have had many offers.. but only one I accepted on.. which turned into a 2 week long period of no talking because each others friends kept telling us stories about one another.. and we have been trying to change.. so figured we might as well just not date... and we are still on speaking term.. which is cool.
I have been letting the barrista's at Starbucks order my drinks for me.. because it fun to try different drinks....
I have taken up a hobby in letter writing to my friends away at college... and actually trying to be more social.. now that I don't have the back drop of school to help me...
Last year I got a 3.9 GPA for the year... and I am still celebrating it.. because i feel after thirteen years I am finally as smart as my teachers claim me to be.. alright.. three teachers did... the other ones put it down because they put that on everyones.

alright blog.. i need sleep.. i have to be up early to mail out letters, go with my dad to the doctors... grab lunch.. call HSD.. and then get to work over at Hallmark.

Tata!